Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Boring

I don't know if it's my job that's boring or everything else going on around me, but this certainly merits taking a look at what the hell is going on from a cynical perspective:

Eminem and wife have finalized a second divorce, after remarrying in January, whoopy. I predict wedding #3 next time he finds himself lonely, depressed, and coked up while locked in the studio and pushing for that magic number tenth Grammy. Nothing says a deserved Grammy like the inspirational husband and father that he is. Well, maybe if ESPN buys the rights to the Grammys, then the drama will excel.

In yesterday's most recent sign of total dumbassness, a 56 year old lady placed her one month old grandson in the gray bin that is meant for your laptop and shoes. Unable to decide who in fact is dumber than the other, both the TSA and lady seemed to not realize that the infant was soon being X-rayed. All parties involved in this incident should probably be shot.

Decider in Chief gave himself that name when he got on television a few months ago to indicate that simply because military experts and everybody else were calling for Rumsfeld's resignation, he's the Decider and he decides that he and Rummy are doing the right thing. Fast forward to losing the midterm elections in November, and it's bye bye Rummy. Now we read today that Bush envisions increasing the size of the US Armed Forces, which is a direct repudiation of his boy Rummy's vision of a small and precise military. Why the Decider needs to stick up for his loser friend only to fire him and then admit that his military ideals don't work, well that's just silly. I really wish someone would just blow him so he can get impeached, unless he's something like this Komodo Dragon that has never gotten laid but still manages to have 8 fertilized eggs inside of her. That's impressive,

I'm just rehashing jokes at this point, but why Time Magazine decided to name you me and everyone else the person of the year for 2006 is pretty stupid. They give special shout outs to us bloggers and other users of the internets for helping shine a light on everything, but it's kind of scary that they give so many props to a communication medium that is effectively destroying their business. Nice one asswipes. See what Colbert has to say about it here.

Perhaps its pictures like this Terry Schiavo look alike down by McSorley's on 7th St. that inspire Time to be inspired by people like me:

Or perhaps its that I can no longer go to dinner at Dojo without feeling inspired by the political ramblings of other bathroom goers. By the way, Dojo is awesomely cheap and I love them. It's probably what I miss most about not living on 9th Street anymore, but luckily my 8 days in the West Village have allowed me to find the other one, which is surprisingly way less funky than the one on Saint Marks:

That top one says "Liberalism is a mental disorder," in case the glare is messing with you. Politics, cheap food, and gross bathrooms really should serve as inspiration to us all. Off to work, laters

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