Monday, January 22, 2007

Bearssss

Go Bearssss. Ditka and Superbowl Shuffle nostalgia is all I need to enjoy the next couple of weeks, so hopefully it won't be too lame waiting for the actual game that will most likely suck and have a way too long halftime featuring Prince.

I don't know why I enjoy watching the Colts lose, but something about Peyton complaining about his "protection issues" and some "drunk kicker" in years past makes him sound like a whiny pussy. As Al Pacino lectures "Steamin" Willy Beamin about the virtues of being the guy that takes the fall for the rest of his team, as quarterbacks are supposed to be warrior/leaders, Any Given Sunday teaches a lesson in more than just how crazy football players are; that said, Peyton does not pass the litmus test and even seems to be a little more physically gifted than his younger brother who also complains less. All I'm saying is: sixdee tooo ta treee, Bearssss, with no hard feelings for brother Eli, although he is destined for years of disappointment over in New Jersey.

Whether it be Big Lovie Smiths or Little Lovie Smiths, I sure hope the Colts suck a fat one and take at least 3 more Bills like losses in seasons to come. Tony Dungee seems like a nice guy, but he's too much of a non-individual being that he and his best friend and fellow NFL Coach Herm Edwards look too much alike (he's also a Jesus freak, which seems sketchy to me). Additionally, if we're supposed to be so excited about a black coach guaranteed a Super Bowl victory, why not make it the guy who's way more brown skinned than the other? Game, Set, Match: Lovie Smith.

As we prepare for more Jack Bauer debauchery, perhaps some attention can be focused on the fact that Kiefer in HD is way sexier than any porn star in HD, as my father's prediction/joke from 3 years ago comes to fruition. It's too bad the NYTimes has journalistic integrity to maintain and can't just say that so-called "razor burn" is in fact a very candy coated version of "herpes where we don't wanna see them." Actually, I don't ever want to see any herpes anywhere, but it looks like porn may not pave the way in this round of distributing cutting-edge technology to the horny consumer. Also looks like Pfizer will have to broadcast their anti-herpes commericals that consist of one sorry couple running through wheat fields and that famous beach in Rio with 10,000 less people on their hands. Seriously, every herpes drug commercial has that famous beach in Rio with that famous Catholic statue on top of the mountain.

This is going nowhere, but the Bearsss are totally going to pummel Peyton.

4 Comments:

Blogger Chris said...

two questions:
a) when do i get to come check out the new pad
3) no comments on miss clinton and her presidential run?

-petrillo

11:54  
Blogger misterlister said...

Besides a guaranteed win for Da Bearsss in Miami against Peyton and the Colts, I predict no less than a 9-peat of consecutive Super Bowl victories. I'm a little unsure about Rex Grossman, so I'll say Da Bearsss only win 73-2.

12:01  
Blogger Adam said...

chris-
a) let's make that happen. I've been away all weekends except for new years and last weekend, so it's been a lil rough. I'll contact you shortly. Even so, your pad isn't so new yet I still haven't seen it, so I'd better reciprocate.

b) Hillary running for prez is old news, and I hope she loses anyway. It's not because I already have a woman being my decider in chief, but it's because Republicans want her to be the Democrat to run because they know she would lose. She lost me at her desire to ban flag burning and video game violence. Although not a favorite pastime of mine, I believe that all non David Coresh like anarchists still deserve to light it up if they so desire. Video game violence is definitely a must, and I'd maybe give her credit if it wasn't an obvious move to pander to people rather than speak what she believes. Senators never win elections and it will likely be different in 08 only because there is no incumbent or VP and two senators pitted against each other means one of them has to win. An ideal election for me would be Mr. Cheney against Barack, who would prove that if you have no voting record, then you are better off. Actually, my left nut could beat Cheney right now, but I like the naive, never voted on a goddam thing Senator approach, not to mention that he is black, sexy, and from Illinois, where they leave off the last S for savings.

16:44  
Blogger Adam said...

Whatever happened to that QB named Kramer on DaBearsss?

NIIIIIIIIIICCE YouTube. Give Rex a few years and he'll have them at 98-0

16:50  

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